Do I really need one of those?

I'll be honest with you...I don't know what I am doing when I am registering for all this baby stuff. I have no idea how many I need of this. I mean does a baby really need a 10 pack of bottles. Do I need 100 breast pads, do they need to be scented in lavender? Actually I guess that would be nice and soothing if my boobs smelled like a flower. I even click the option at Babies r us and Target to have the computer to register for things for me, but it was all a lot of stuff and duplicates from store to store, so I trimmed the list down tremendously. i did let Chris pick out a few things on Babies R Us, so need less to say, Alex's first chew toys will be John Deere brand. And no unlike how that sounded, Alex is not our puppy but will be our beautiful son. I have been tempted to buy a bunch of clothes for Alex as well, but guessing how big he is going to be and buying him a $40 out fit is like guessing what size I will be in April and buying a $200 dress. It is so difficult to imagine that he is going to be here so soon ( really it seems like it is taking forever).

I really feel like my registries are missing something. I know that I am missing pacifiers on the Target's registries because I can't find them anywhere!on the website!! I might have to go to Target myself and register for them in person, which I was trying to avoid, since I don't favor walking too much right now. WhenI registered in persont for my wedding registry it got out of control and for a while (until I figured out what I really needed) I had 17 pages of stuff on my registry.

I finally decided and ordered Alex's nursery bedding. I decided to go with the middle priced classic Pottery Barn bedding. It is so nice and crisp...with simple white bed skirt, bumper and sheet, it will be trimmed and monogrammed with navy blue. I figured I can accent with red (the red in the pattern is what made the $600 bedding stand out to me, I guess I can take all the money I saved and buy diapers).

Saturday, i slept probably 18 hours of the entire day, so when i went to church Sunday people told me that I looked so good and rested. Maybe that should be a testament that I should sleep 18 hours every other day, so at least I will look great 1/2 the time.

These complements also came with the frequent question to my dad..."Is Cynthia Sure the due date she is telling us is correct?" Meaning..."She sure look bigger than we think she should". My dad says that the questions are like addressing him as my dad, in concern, and as knowledgeable nurse who should have a medical explaination for my large pregnant body. I don't know how to take this. On one hand, maybe people's perception of me was that of a a small girl...on the other hand I am probably just really big and about to give birth to a massive baby boy. Probably the latter of the two will be true.

Oh well...any advice...

Cynthia

BLAH

Okay I said I would write again when my attitude was better, but from what I hear, it won't be much better from here on out. I am just worn out all the time. I can't decide if it is the extra weight or the lack of sleep (it gets more difficult every day to sleep). I don't see how I can possible get any bigger, and I have like 11 1/2 weeks or so to go!

I have been obsessed lately on buying this extravagant crib bedding for Alex. On one hand, I am think that I am losing my mind and need to just buy some kitchy pattern from babies r us with barn animals on it. The other half of me is saying that I should splurge and buy exactly what I want. I am even trying to compromise with myself...I can buy pottery barn stuff for less than half the cost for the same custom order I am looking at. This is petty stuff I know. Chris is being sympathetic to me, but often reminds me that Alex will never know what it all looked like, and I remind him that it really isn't for Alex's viewing as it is for mine.

I just booked a one day crash course is birthing. It was the only one day course left at Baptist I could take on a sat. I could have gone to one that is like 4 -6 weeks on a Monday,but I really want Chris to be there, and he may not get to go on the Monday night. I have the feeling that they will book him out of town a lot until the end of March, to make up for the month or so he will be working closer to home.

Goodness I can not wait for Alex! I keep telling myself that in 10 weeks I am at 38 weeks and that is full term! I am hoping the sight of him will help me forget the swollen ankles, the aching back, the indigestion, and the sleepless nights.

Keep on encouraging me....

Cynthia

In the clear!

Yesterday I went in for my 3 hour glucose tolerance test.

I felt awful. I had to fast for 12 hours (really 15hrs if you count eh time I was in the doctors office) and for the last few days I have had some major gastric pain ( i know you all don't really want to hear this, but I am pretty sure that is what it is, but I have been tempted to drive my self to the E.R. a few times today thinking it is pre-term labor, but I talked to the nurse about it yesterday, it is gas).

Anyways,I had to drink this terrible concoction and have my finger pricked every hour until noon. and after the 4th drop of blood, I passed. So I guess I can carry on eating my normal meals, though I am a little more conscious of what is going in.

For the first time I am feeling a little tired of being pregnant. Alex is big, I am big, and he is sitting on my lower GI. It is not fun.

I now have stretch marks. I have gone thru a econo-sized bottle of coco butter lotion that is supposed to help prevent them and I look in the mirror as I am applying it and see stretch marks. Not on my side (I got those quick) But on my belly. I guess they are inevitable.

Oh well...I will write next time when I am in a better mood.

Next week 3rd trimester! I am counting the days!

cynthia

Centering myself

Besides the mixed news about my blood sugar, I have had a week of growth. I joined an exercise class that I am really enjoying. It is an Aqua moms water aerobics class, and even though I have been in the fitness/ aquatics business for almost 10yrs, I have really never voluntarily taken a water aerobics class. I am really enjoying the work out and really the good company of ladies going through the same thing as I am. I am also doing something for myself and that feels good.

I also have been thinking a lot about centering prayer and meditation this week since I am going to help explain it to a junior high class this weekend. I attended a Centering prayer retreat today and in this contemplative time I got to release and just breath and that was nice. I thought about my 7 chaukras and how they effect baby Alex and put them in context with my life. I am going to try to practice this as much as possible (practice is the key).

Though I have not really been faithful today, I have also thought about eating better, even if my blood sugar test is regular on Wednesday. I am gong to try to eat as many whole foods as possible and get out of the habit of eating processed foods and junk. This is going to be my hardest challenge.

Well I will let you know how it goes!

Cynthia

This week...its been ok

Well I haven't written in a few days...but I have had a lot to think about since monday. My doc. appointment went okay...Alex is great measuring right on time, the Nurse didn't gripe me out (even though I gained 9lbs since my last visit0. But unfortunately my blood sugar was really high. Not like borderline, but really high. I have to go back next wed. to take a 3-hour fasting blood sugar test. I have felt guilty this week, I might have over indulged. Befor xmas I had talked about how guilty I feel about eating bad, so I have been eating well, well last week I threw caution to the wind and ate pizza and donuts and fried Twinkies. I know...I am smart enough to know that I could not have caused gestational diabetes, but I am still feeling really bad about it. I feel like I have done something wrong, but oh well...I am going to do something about it.

Anyways...

Tuesday Chris and I put a deposit on an apartment...it will be tight to pay rent and a mortgage, but we can make it.

Wed. I joined my first Aqua moms class...I will write more about that in my next entry!

Cynthia

Doctors Appointment today

Today I go to the doctor to check my blood sugar level for gestation diabetes. I haven't been able to eat any carbs or sugar today....no fruit, cereal, toast, OJ,...just a hard boiled egg....I am hungry!!!

I am also nervous about being scolded about my weight gain (30lbs).

Luckily I can fire back because I am getting aconsent form today to participate in a prenatal water exercise class.

I'll write later...when I know how my test has gone.

Comment please...I can use all the advice I can get.

Cynthia

Happy New Year!...2008..the Year of Alex!!!!

I hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Year! No wine or Champange for this girl this year, but I did eat an extra piece of pie every chance I had. It was nice having a laid back time, especially knowing that Chrismas will never be the same, next year we will have an 8 month old rolling around and our needs will not be ther focus as much as his needs.



Being home in Memphis was nice, but it also was a harsh reminder that we haven't sold it yet. I am beginning to get that "nesting" instict and if we don't sell the house soon, I will be renting an apartment soon. But it was nice to have a few days just to do nothing and stay in my PJ's. On day I caught a full days marithon of True Life on MTV.

So that i can continue with my story let me tell you that one of the stories they had on MTV was about being young and pregnant ( and unmarried). One of the girls was down in New Orleans and in my dismay it shows her with her mom and boyfriend like 8 months pregnant in a bar adn walking down Bourbon street (not driking...just hanging out, sipping on a soft drink). on Bourbon St. in the crowd a passer by runs right into the Preggo Girl. She goes crazy, screaming crying...ready to kick butt, until she is calmed down. I was not under standing this...I thought the girl got what she deserved.

Thus to my story.....
Friday nightthe next day (after being dismayed at the girl on MTV)...our friends arrive to visit for a couple of nights to go to the Liberty bowl with us and to other Miss State events...by 5pm I was sitting in Pat O'briens and later it was on to Coyote Ugly (where I didn't even take off my coat or scarf in fear people would notice I was preggo). I walked up and down crowded Beale Street for over 6 hours. The next day we went to the liberty bowl. Getting into the Stadium was hell and a mob like scene started to arise. I got separated from Chris and I got stuck in a corner. At some point this very drunk bimbo fell back into me...I was so mad!!! I could have kicked her butt....In fact she asked me to HELP HEr UP...I told her I couldnt because she fell on me and I am pregnant...at that point instead of saying sorry she patted my belly and asked if the baby was a boy or a girl. I told her to stop talking to me and leave me alone...she looked at me and said what ever. If there were not children and cops around ( and If I weren't in Youth Ministry) I would have drop kicked that girl and punched her in the face...for falling on me! I didn't want anything to happen to my belly. Trust me I am not usually violent.

I now understand the girl on MTV. I think it is a maternal instinct of protection that I didn't think I had. and I didn't think I would get until I had Alex. But it has begun. I can imagine that when Alex is born I will be like 1000 x's more protective of him in real life. This is a new Feeling!